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WarriorAegis
04-03-2013, 07:06 PM
Q: What would have happened if Ezio was Ezio Auditore da Venezia instead of Firenze?

A: He'd be out of Florins (say it out loud and focus on the s).

Q: What's an Assassin without a Hidden Blade?

A: Pointless.

That's all I have for now. Hope you enjoy them. Add your own!

ACfan443
04-03-2013, 07:40 PM
I just came up with this, it's a bit grisly and stupid

Connor's mother's remains were found at the auditore household, mr auditore was arrested shortly afterwards.
A news reporter at the scene of crime enquired about the murder and the arrest of the man, to which the investigator replied, "well you see, mr auditore has been arrested because he ET-ZIO"

:p

sajber00
04-03-2013, 07:51 PM
What's Ezio's favorite game?
Super mario

montagemik
04-03-2013, 09:37 PM
AC3 - 3 years in the making ................. ( observational comedy )

ProletariatPleb
04-03-2013, 09:45 PM
AC3 - 3 years in the making ................. ( observational comedy )
Hahhahaa

http://i.imgur.com/iqzJ7d5.jpg

itsamea-mario
04-03-2013, 10:14 PM
There won't be many jokes here. Everyone here is a humorless sob.

Assassin_M
04-03-2013, 10:19 PM
AC II best game ever...Hahahahahaha

montagemik
04-03-2013, 10:20 PM
There won't be many jokes here. Everyone here is a humorless sob.

I have a great sense of humour - I've bought every game so far .

ProletariatPleb
04-03-2013, 10:26 PM
I have a great sense of humour - I've bought every game so far .
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wcinzmfZeCc

Assassin_M
04-03-2013, 10:35 PM
I knew this was going to be a stupid thread

TheHumanTowel
04-03-2013, 10:37 PM
I knew this was going to be a stupid thread
I know I too was really looking forward to the stirring insightful debates that could arise from the topic "AC jokes"

ProletariatPleb
04-03-2013, 10:41 PM
I knew this was going to be a stupid thread
and yet here you are...

Assassin_M
04-03-2013, 10:46 PM
I know I too was really looking forward to the stirring insightful debates that could arise from the topic "AC jokes"
Fail..

I was looking for....I dunno.....JOKES ???

Assassin_M
04-03-2013, 10:47 PM
and yet here you are...
I never said I`m leaving

itsamea-mario
04-03-2013, 10:59 PM
Fail..

I was looking for....I dunno.....JOKES ???

Well then make some jokes.
Lead by example!

ProletariatPleb
04-03-2013, 11:01 PM
Well then make some jokes.
Lead by example!
He look, it's-a-him Mario!

Assassin_M
04-03-2013, 11:05 PM
Well then make some jokes.
Lead by example!
What`s a black thing flying in the sky and says "Nothing is true, everything is permitted" ?

A dumb crow :|

That sucked

ProletariatPleb
04-03-2013, 11:06 PM
What`s a black thing flying in the sky and says "Nothing is true, everything is permitted" ?
Al Mualim in his robes :3

xx-pyro
04-03-2013, 11:09 PM
ACII was the best AC game. ACI is bearable to play more than once.

These jokes get tiresome on these forums.

TheHumanTowel
04-03-2013, 11:22 PM
ACII was the best AC game. ACI is bearable to play more than once.

These jokes get tiresome on these forums.
Aren't you a barrel of laughs?

xx-pyro
04-03-2013, 11:25 PM
Aren't you a barrel of laughs?

I also do birthday parties.

montagemik
04-03-2013, 11:28 PM
AC3 Battle Hardened pack DLC - Enhance your multiplayer experience

AC4 Black Chest edition - 119.99 :o

ACfan443
04-03-2013, 11:32 PM
Saw that this reached 3 pages, excitedly clicked to see what had been posted...and I come to find this.

montagemik
04-03-2013, 11:36 PM
Saw that this reached 3 pages, excitedly clicked to see what had been posted...and I come to find this.

Why so serious ?

ACfan443
04-03-2013, 11:45 PM
Why so serious ?

Cause this is a jokes thread, and the OP's intention was for people to post real jokes(whether good or bad), not half witted remarks.
I've searched the web for AC jokes, and have never found any, so y'know, this thread may have the potential to change that :p

Assassin_M
04-03-2013, 11:51 PM
Why so serious ?
Maybe because there`re only 2 jokes in 3 pages ?

montagemik
04-04-2013, 12:02 AM
Cause this is a jokes thread, and the OP's intention was for people to post real jokes(whether good or bad), not half witted remarks.
I've searched the web for AC jokes, and have never found any, so y'know, this thread may have the potential to change that :p


I posted a joke = '" AC3 Battle Hardened pack DLC - Enhance your multiplayer experience "" Ubisoft even wrote that joke themselves -

Go try play the DLC game mode you like , It's hilarious :rolleyes:

silvermercy
04-04-2013, 12:03 AM
Are we allowed jokes in image form?
*sneakily posts image anyway*

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lgsjttfvAl1qdu4r9.jpg
http://sassycreed.tumblr.com/post/3355139758/righthandman

montagemik
04-04-2013, 12:05 AM
Maybe because there`re only 2 jokes in 3 pages ?

So basically it seems people aren't taking this Joke thread Seriously .................. How funny is that ?

Assassin_M
04-04-2013, 12:15 AM
So basically it seems people aren't taking this Joke thread Seriously .................. How funny is that ?
so funny

ACfan443
04-04-2013, 12:18 AM
So basically it seems people aren't taking this Joke thread Seriously .................. How funny is that ?

Oh gawwd...
I'm just gonna end up laughing at these anyway.

silvermercy
04-04-2013, 12:22 AM
The comments are even funnier than the jokes. Please go on!

http://newnation.sg/wp-content/uploads/eat-popcorn-3D.gif

montagemik
04-04-2013, 12:25 AM
If you want the Best material - You'll have to buy a Season Pass .

WarriorAegis
04-04-2013, 01:32 AM
Dang, this makes me sad. :(

Can't see anything? Maybe it's because your Eagle Vision...

*puts on sunglasses*

... just took flight.

YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH.

Ygdrasel
04-04-2013, 01:33 AM
So Ezio's father and brothers walk into a bar...

They wake up in the gallows.

WarriorAegis
04-04-2013, 06:38 PM
What's Ezio's favorite game?
Super mario

I like that one. That's hilarious.


So Ezio's father and brothers walk into a bar...

They wake up in the gallows.

That's humorous in a morbid way. :P

One of my favorite jokes from the Ezio Saga is in Sequence 5 of Brotherhood:


Courtesan: Mind if I walk with you?

Papal Guard: Ja, I mean... I don't mind.

Courtesan: I never been [here] before, the old ruins make me nervous.

Papal Guard: I can protect you.

Courtesan: I bet. That is quite a chest you have there.

Papal Guard: It's not mine.

Courtesan: But you're holding it in those strong arms of those.


I especially like the "chest" pun. XD

TheOnlyEzio
04-04-2013, 07:35 PM
Alex hutchinson - "we plan on giving long term players a proper pay off"

also, AC1 wasn't repetitive... hahaha

UrDeviant1
04-04-2013, 07:36 PM
The end of Desmond's saga.

ACfan443
04-04-2013, 07:38 PM
Alex hutchinson - "we plan on giving long term players a proper pay off"

Haha Ok, I found this one funny

TheOnlyEzio
04-04-2013, 07:49 PM
The end of Desmond's saga.

Little did we know, ubisoft are infact the biggest trolls in gaming history

WarriorAegis
04-06-2013, 06:04 PM
Yeeeahh... the modern ending needed work.

ProletariatPleb
04-06-2013, 06:11 PM
Yeeeahh... the modern ending needed work.
Pfffftttttttthahahahahaa ahahahahahahahahaha

pirate1802
04-06-2013, 06:25 PM
Desmond is such an interesting character :p

ProletariatPleb
04-06-2013, 06:30 PM
Desmond is such an interesting character :p
Desmond will be the ultimate assassin.

Megas_Doux
04-06-2013, 07:01 PM
ACB is effing hard!!!!

Keep dying and dying.....

AjinkyaParuleka
04-06-2013, 08:52 PM
Ubisoft:We want to improve our relationship with PC players..
HAHAHHAHAHAHA.

AdamPearce
04-07-2013, 01:53 AM
Connor: Liberty IS Peace!

LOL.

pirate1802
04-07-2013, 03:55 AM
Ubisoft:We want to improve our relationship with PC players..
HAHAHHAHAHAHA.

Thats a good one!


Connor: Liberty IS Peace!.

ANd this one too! I facepalmed when I heard him say that. -_-

SaibotMK
04-07-2013, 04:58 AM
I have a great sense of humour - I've bought every game so far .

Hahah



Desmond has a ***** pack

lol it seriously censored f a n n y

In AC4 their will be a achievement "Steal their women!"

AdamPearce
04-07-2013, 05:16 AM
Thats a good one!



ANd this one too! I facepalmed when I heard him say that. -_-

Me too but well it's his ''personality'' so...

WarriorAegis
04-13-2013, 04:33 PM
So, what's Connor without a Tomahawk?

He's no longer bad-axe.

silvermercy
04-13-2013, 04:59 PM
So, what's Connor without a Tomahawk?

He's no longer bad-axe.

LOL

He's a good-axe now. :)