PDA

View Full Version : Flying Limericks



p-11.cAce
04-26-2007, 10:03 AM
In thickening clouds he was caught,

Though his skill on the gauges was naught.

The spiral, he found,

Led straight to the ground

And the proverbial farm that he'd bought.

Your turn http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/winky.gif

LEBillfish
04-26-2007, 10:12 AM
up, doom, down, boom.....

VF-17_Jolly
04-26-2007, 10:58 AM
I thought it was the Irish Aerobatic Display Team http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif

Divine-Wind
04-26-2007, 11:03 AM
For some reason Flying Limericks sounds like a g-rated obscenity one might jokingly throw at someone. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/34.gif

"Beware, O thou fell Flying Limerick! Lest the flightless Bard who thought thee up remove thy rhyming wings!"

Sorry, I didn't sleep much last night... http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/53.gif

ShrikeHawk
04-26-2007, 11:13 AM
In cloudy skies, a Spitfire I wield.

From early morning rise at North Weald.

Tally Ho! A 109 I sight.

Over hill and dale we fight.

'Til he auger in at St. Sebastian's field

Warrington_Wolf
04-26-2007, 12:02 PM
There once was a pilot from Nantucket
who had.....
Oh wait, I'd get banned if I posted that one http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/35.gif.

PBNA-Boosher
04-26-2007, 12:02 PM
Ah! I love Limericks! For those that don't know what they are, they are 5 line poems. Lines 1, 2, and 5 must have three rhythmic feet and their last words must rhyme. Lines 3 and 4 must have two metric feet and must rhyme a different way.

One of my favorite examples is this:

There once was a man from Peru
Who dreamed he was kissing his shoe.
He awoke in the night
in a terrible fright
and found it was perfectly true.

anyway... aviation limericks. Here's a bad one from me

Ah! The thrill of pure power and speed!
To your advice I shall pay no heed.
For when something goes wrong,
you'll be laughing along
with the checklists you know I can't read.

leitmotiv
04-26-2007, 12:20 PM
There once was a 109 jock from Berlin

Who thought he could never spin

But when he was distraught

His arrogance was for naught

And he blew a nice hole in the Rijn

willyvic
04-26-2007, 12:39 PM
A good pilot will choose a good stang.

Upon climb on his prop he will hang.

Boring holes in the skies,

with fire in his eyes,

he'll down all of his foes with bang.



Next!

WV

Old_Canuck
04-26-2007, 01:33 PM
A mysterious ace online
Killed many and never did whine
But the FMs changed
And the ace was deranged
"Where's my trim-on-a-slider
you swine!"

major_setback
04-26-2007, 01:59 PM
There was a young pilot called Maddox
Who's feet - they stank out the barracks.
When flying one day,
His co pilot said:
'Who filled the plane up with haddocks?'


....sorry, I'm very tired http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-indifferent.gif.

Divine-Wind
04-26-2007, 02:16 PM
There once was a chap named Raaid
His logic oft' in need of some aid
Yet whenever he left
The people bereft
All looked freneticly for his maid

HuninMunin
04-26-2007, 02:41 PM
Wie sehrend er floß,
in des Wassers Flut fließt er nicht mehr.
Starr ward er und steif,
herrisch der harte Stahl:
heißes Blut doch fließt ihm bald!

........................................

Den der Bruder schuf,
den schimmernden Reif,
in den er gezaubert zwingende Kraft,
das helle Gold, das zum Herrscher macht,
ihn hab' ich gewonnen!
Ich walte sein!


ok....
I admit it - those are no limericks but they are Stabreim, a kind of ancient german limerick http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/halo.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/35.gif

general_kalle
04-26-2007, 02:41 PM
There once was a chap named Raaid
His logic oft' in need of some aid
Yet whenever he left
The people bereft
All looked freneticly for his maid

lol best one yet.

okay may not exakly be a limerick.

one i just hushed up.

a spit so high
jeez it can fly
always nice
a pilot wise
would fly a spit so high

check this (http://www.airborne.org/flying/poems.htm#High%20Flight)

one of them:


By Keith Murray (Capt Colonial Airlines).
Written in 1941 and first published in October 1942 in
"The Airline Pilot" the monthly magazine of US ALPA.

I am the co-pilot, I sit on the right,
It's up to me to be quick and bright;
I never talk back for I have regrets,
But I have to remember what the Captain forgets.

I make out the flight plan and study the weather,
Pull up the gear, stand by to feather;
Make out the mail forms and do the reporting;
And fly the old crate while the Captain is courting.

I take the readings, adjust the power,
Put on the heaters when we're in a shower;
Tell him where we are on the darkest of night,
And do all the bookwork without any light.

I call for my Captain and buy him cokes;
I always laugh at his corney jokes;
And once in a while when his landings are rusty,
I always come through with, "By gosh it's gusty".

All in all I'm a general stooge,
As I sit on the right of the man I call "Scrooge";
I guess you think this is past understanding,
But maybe some day he will give me a landing

general_kalle
04-28-2007, 04:56 PM
anyone keep this rolling

John_Wayne_
04-28-2007, 05:37 PM
A fellow down Budapest way
Found Spitfires exceedingly gay
When proved it was besser
Than the past it old Messer
He....

Aw, ferget it.

Beaufort-RAF
04-28-2007, 06:06 PM
There was a Luftwhiner named Heinz
Who longed for victorious blue times
He goostepped round his room
Dreaming of Mustangs facing doom
But the Spitfire owned his Me109s

Feathered_IV
04-28-2007, 06:25 PM
So I logged on the forum today.
And thought about something to say.
But whenever I do,
The thread falls to page two.
And everyone else goes away. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/sadeyes.gif

tomtheyak
04-28-2007, 08:24 PM
I once asked a noob caught kill stealing,
if he knew with whom he was dealing.
When he laughed at my plight
He was in my gunsight
His yelps as I fired; most appealing!

tomtheyak
04-28-2007, 08:28 PM
Originally posted by Feathered_IV:
So I logged on the forum today.
And thought about something to say.
But whenever I do,
The thread falls to page two.
And everyone else goes away. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/sadeyes.gif

Feathered my boy, never fear!
Your rhyming always brings me cheer.
If I surmise correctly,
we'll see here directly
more posts from our piloting peers!

Feathered_IV
04-28-2007, 08:53 PM
http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif

There once was a player named Dead_Set,
Who made love in his tir headset.
He said: "I don't think it's wrong to."
"Gives her something to hang onto."
"It's the comms that she hates from the outset."

polak5
04-29-2007, 04:06 AM
is Iron Maiden okay to use http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif

There goes the siren that warns of the air raid
Then comes the sound of the guns sending flak
Out for the scramble weve got to get airborne
Got to get up for the coming attack.

Jump in the cockpit and start up the engines
Remove all the wheelblocks theres no time to waste
Gathering speed as we head down the runway
Gotta get airborne before its too late.

Running, scrambling, flying
Rolling, turning, diving, going in again
Run, live to fly, fly to live, do or die
Run, live to fly, fly to live. aces high.

Move in to fire at the mainstream of bombers
Let off a sharp burst and then turn away
Roll over, spin round and come in behind them
Move to their blindsides and firing again.

Bandits at 8 oclock move in behind us
Ten me-109s out of the sun
Ascending and turning our spitfires to face them
Heading straight for them I press down my guns

Rolling, turning, diving
Rolling, turning, diving, going in again
Run, live to fly, fly to live, do or die
Run, live to fly, fly to live, aces high.

http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_cool.gif

Feathered_IV
04-29-2007, 04:15 AM
Originally posted by PBNA-Boosher: For those that don't know what they are, they are 5 line poems. Lines 1, 2, and 5 must have three rhythmic feet and their last words must rhyme. Lines 3 and 4 must have two metric feet and must rhyme a different way.

There was a young pilot called Andy.
Who had a co-pilot called Mandy.
When he called for full flaps,
She gave him a slap.
And said, "Certainly not! You're too randy"

Like that?

major_setback
04-29-2007, 04:57 AM
As if said by a new boy:

Though new to the game I'll endeavour
To master the terms of the clever.
I'll follow the jocks,
And remove my chocks,
Use my plane as a taxi though? - Never!


______________

MEGILE
04-29-2007, 11:34 AM
Originally posted by Old_Canuck:
A mysterious ace online
Killed many and never did whine
But the FMs changed
And the ace was deranged
"Where's my trim-on-a-slider
you swine!"


LOLwaffles

willyvic
04-29-2007, 05:09 PM
There exists here a pilot so fancy.

Whose postings have made us quite antsy.

The mob will decry

he speaks nothing but lies.

To which he'll respond "you poor nancy".

WV

HuninMunin
04-29-2007, 05:14 PM
Priceless http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-very-happy.gif

I almost destroyed my 1969 recording of "Die Walküre" when I tried to shuffle it into the CD-Drive and suddenly read this one. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/16x16_smiley-mad.gif http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/59.gif

willyvic
04-30-2007, 10:38 AM
Monday morning bump. I know we have more to come. http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_cool.gif