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I_KG100_Prien
02-16-2008, 11:14 PM
Soldier returns from leave a woman

An Austrian army officer called Gregor went on holiday - and came back as a woman called Jasmin.

The 46-year-old captain took three months leave after complaining of stress, and had a sex change operation before returning to barracks in Gratkorn.

Other officers and soldiers were reportedly shocked when Jasmin, whose full name has not been revealed by the army, came back.

But senior army staff have decided Jasmin can keep her old job and will not be demoted.

Defence Ministry officials have also accepted the decision by Jasmin, who has two children, to have a sex change.

Ute Axmann, press spokesperson for the Austrian defence ministry, said: "We accept this very personal decision."

A soldier at the barracks told Austrian media: "Everybody has a weird feeling about it: a colleague leaving the building as a man and returning as a woman after his holiday is more than a bit strange. We will have to wait and see if this leads to problems."

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Lawyer 'bit colleague's breast'

A Hungarian lawyer is facing court action after he bit a female colleague's breast at a civic dinner.

Laszlo Papp, 32, head lawyer for the Mayor's Office in Gyor, reportedly told attractive Imola Kovac, 26: "I don't fancy my chicken breast - I think I'll try yours instead."

The mayor described his lawyer's actions as a joke but Kovac did not see the funny side and has now launched legal action against him for sexual assault.

She said: "I am taking legal action because I do not think biting a colleague's breasts is appropriate behaviour for a civil servant."

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"And wait'll you see all the closet space!"

An estate agent who took a prospective buyer to view a house in central England found the owner hanging dead in a closet, the agency said Thursday.

It was the first viewing of the 350,000-pound ($700,000) house which had been on the market for a week. The owner was hanging from a belt inside a walk-in closet in the main bedroom.

"It was quite a shock," said a spokesman for estate agents Hartleys. "Our agent quickly ushered everyone out, locked the property and called the authorities."

The owner, a single man in his 40s, is thought to have committed suicide. He inherited the house from his mother who died recently, the estate agents said.

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The dumbest ever quiz answers

Question: What was Gandhi's first name? Contestant's answer: Goosey Goosey.

Warning to all those know-alls who shout at the television screen when contestants offer dumb answers to blindingly obvious questions -- one day that could be you.

From regional radio shows to "Who Wants To be a Millionaire?" and "University Challenge," people make fools of themselves -- as internet site www.jumpingjacksbar.com (http://www.jumpingjacksbar.com) found in collating some of the worst howlers.

Here are leading contenders for the "Dumb Down" gold medal:

Presenter: What happened in Dallas on November 22,1963?

Contestant: I don't know, I wasn't watching it then

Presenter: Which American actor is married to Nicole Kidman?

Contestant: Forrest Gump

Presenter: In which country is Mount Everest?

Contestant: Er, it's not in Scotland is it?

Presenter: Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci

Contestant: Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

Presenter: In which European city was the first opera house opened in 1637?

Contestant: Sydney

Presenter: How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?

Contestant: (after long pause) Fourteen days

Presenter: Where did the D-Day landings take place?

Contestant: (after pause) Pearl Harbor?

Presenter: What is the currency in India

Contestant: Ramadan

Presenter: Johnny Weissmuller died on this day. Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play?

Contestant: Jesus

I_KG100_Prien
02-16-2008, 11:19 PM
Oh, and something to cap off your day..

Enjoy.... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iShb6NBtCI4)

For the Hugh Laurie fans out there... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6AvMUR_XMlg)

foxyboy1964
02-17-2008, 12:33 AM
Goosey Goosey Gandhi http://forums.ubi.com/groupee_common/emoticons/icon_biggrin.gif

The first video was a bit disturbing, on several levels. I'm sort of glad I don't know what they were saying, but Hugh Laurie was cool.

Pirschjaeger
02-17-2008, 02:49 AM
Agreed, the first vid was creepy. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/sadeyes.gif

Low_Flyer_MkIX
02-17-2008, 06:35 AM
Hungarian lawyer? Nah.....couldn't be. http://forums.ubi.com/images/smilies/blink.gif