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View Full Version : AC Unity Dead Kings "DLC" - A broken piece of ****?



Angrad9273
02-07-2015, 08:05 PM
So let me start this out with a few points of interest prior to my starting of the Assassin's Creed Unity DLC "Dead Kings" -
1. I LOVE the Assassin's Creed series; it's been one of my favorite video game series right alongside the Mass Effect trilogy.
2. I played through all of Assassin's Creed Unity despite it being horribly optimized; and despite being pretty much unable to play multiplayer until they patched the game 600 times.

My playthrough of AC Unity was filled with horrible lag spikes in my SINGLEPLAYER EXPERIENCE, skeleton monsters invading France (the booga-booga-I-have-no-face glitches), as well as countless other horrible glitches including (but not limited to): character models literally cycling between each other three feet from Arno and awkward wall glitches that force me to restart from the last checkpoint or in some cases even needing to end the process and restart the game. And those are the just glitches.
The game itself has been a miserable experience as well! The combat is horribly sluggish and uncomfortable, the parkour makes getting into windows impossible, the story is complete and absolute sh*t so much so to the point where I'd rather go play freakin Garry's Mod Day One as oppose to this game... Incredibly disappointing all around- especially considering how much I loved this series before hand.

Now I know everyone's made complaints about this game and I know I am probably preaching to the choir -- but this DLC
THIS ****ING DLC
is INEXCUSABLY ****
"Why?" You may ask,
"I've been playing through- its bad but we expected bad, didn't we?"
... Yeaaaaaah.... So HERE is my actual problem (the reason why I am posting on the forum here, cause MAYBE someone can help me)

I started up the Dead Kings DLC and it began (as I'm sure it did with everyone, hopefully) with a brief shot of a building (cathedral?) before suddenly flipping over to Arno who awaits my command inside some sorta tavern building- standing around in his poorly textured poop-cloak and hobo garb... Well my game is a little different.
You see Arno? He HATES Cathedrals. He FEARS them.
Like that stereotypical house-wife thing where she leaps up onto a table or counter at the sign of a mouse and calls for the husband or the cat to come kill the poor little bastard?
Arno- in all his horrifically derp glory- places his left foot upon the table before him and lifts himself skyward in a single mighty bound and then proceeds to... Stand there.

I can't move him, I can't active Eagle Vision even.

What do you usually do when Unity glitches out? (A common occurrence as we all know) Well obviously you just press START and press that beaten and battered "Restart and Last Checkpoint" button, yeah? Should be easy?
Expect it isn't.
Cause SOMEBODY DECIDED IT WOULD BE A BRILLIANT IDEA TO DISABLE THE REGULAR MENU IN THE INTRODUCTORY SECTION OF THE DLC! BECAUSE THEY WANT TO BE ****ING EDGY AND COOL I'M GUESSING!

So THAT'S my situation:

Arno is stuck upon the mighty eldritch table of R'lyeh, unable to free himself from the non euclidean designs of the mighty pine wood monstrosity.
I cannot exit the DLC area- I can't even open a menu.
All I can do it CTRL-ALT-DLT and end the process; I've restarted the game a dozen times in desperate hope that the surge of energy from that 40 minute loading screen may give mighty Arno the strength he needs to pull free from that twisted maddening labyrinth of chaos that is the three foot tall table- but alas no such success has been had.

Game is perma-broken now?
What do?

10/10 - Would TOTALLY play again.