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Thread: The Man Rules | Forums

  1. #1
    We always hear "The Rules" From the female side.

    Now here are the rules from the male side.

    These are our rules!

    Please note.....these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

    (1) Men are NOT mind readers.

    (1) Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    (1) Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    (1) Crying is blackmail.

    (1) Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

    (1) Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    (1) Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    (1) Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

    (1) If you think you're fat, you probably are.
    Don't ask us.

    (1) If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one.

    (1) You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done, but Not both, and If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    (1) Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.....

    (1) Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    (1) ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit, and We have no idea what mauve is.

    (1) If it itches, it will be scratched, because We just do that .

    (1) If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    (1) If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    (1) When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.....Really .

    (1) Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball or golf.

    (1) You have enough clothes.

    (1) You have too many shoes.

    (1) I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    (1) Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

    Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.

    Pass this to as many women as you can to give them a bigger laugh.
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  2. #2
    Senior Member Cajun76's Avatar
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    I'm not on your email list for a reason...
    Good hunting,
    Cajun76

    Check it, bleed. Bro... was on! Didn't trip. But the folks was freakin', man. Hey, and the pilots were laid to the bone, Home. So Blood hammered out and jammed jet ship. Tightened that bad sucker inside the runaway like a mother. Sheet. - Airplane II
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  3. #3
    Spot on ey, feminists and the like really give me the sh!ts with their hypocrisy. For example, while I was listening to the radio today, I realised a large majority of the songs sung by male vocalists are about lovin a woman n all that rubbish, whilst many of the female vocalists' songs are about either dumping men, or getting back or whatever. If some male singer released a song called 'Dump that b1tch!' imagine the uproar!

    Sorry for the rant though, great post and it made me chuckle
    ------------------------------

    [I]You can have no idea just how hostile aircraft can be until they come to your area...
    Aircraft which strafe or bomb your posit
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  4. #4
    Gotta love Johnboy and Billy .
    "The basis of our governments being the opinion of the people, the very first object should be to keep that right; and were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter.[Europe], under pretence of governing they have divided their nations into two classes, wolves and sheep. If once [the people] become inattentive to the public affairs, you and I, and Congress, and Assemblies, judges and governors shall all become wolves. " - Thomas Jefferson
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  5. #5
    Originally posted by Odin_Part_2:
    (1) Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.....
    That should be a law!
    Blairgowrie
    is still
    da man!

    foxyboy1964 a.k.a. PINKY!
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  6. #6
    (1) Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
    My fav. This is the one single thing I would change about women (if I could change just one, lol).
    "The basis of our governments being the opinion of the people, the very first object should be to keep that right; and were it left to me to decide whether we should have a government without newspapers, or newspapers without a government, I should not hesitate a moment to prefer the latter.[Europe], under pretence of governing they have divided their nations into two classes, wolves and sheep. If once [the people] become inattentive to the public affairs, you and I, and Congress, and Assemblies, judges and governors shall all become wolves. " - Thomas Jefferson
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