The Age and Country Hotel - Part III; Evolution from the Glitch | Forums

[Speedyserd]

Speedy tried to think fast, which is so much easier to do in normal English than it was in Eivien but parts of her mental speech were still slipping back into it.

"Ok fine, you can modify the refrigerator... but only on one... no, TWO conditions!!!!" Speedy declared.

The Ahuras sighed. "Fine, what?"

"One: that you return my refrigerator back to its original state once this whole phasing stabilization from being erupted with a deadly volcanic eruption is over, ok?" the stork asked.
"Well, it might just be easier to buy a new one when it is done..." the one named Hamil commented.
"No, I want my original one back! And TWO: any other kind of damage done to this hotel as a result of this refrigerator modification OR protection from this volcano needs to be repaired by you two before you dissipate out into the night. Do I make myself clear?"

The Ahuras sighed again. "I think we really have no choice,"
"Other than to leave her outside in the eruption,"

"I HEARD THAT!"

"That was intended to be heard,"

"Don't you make me go berzerk on you!" Speedy warned.
"Ooooo you wouldn't like her berzerk," warned Z.

"Fine fine fine, we agree to the conditions, but we need to get started, now!"

[Zander Nyrond]

There follows a period of frenzied activity: Hamil and Quarl busily rearranging the components of Speedy's beloved freezer, while Jahura and Zander race through the town placing inflatables and helping those who are willing to link out to Nueva Roma.

"Something has been niggling at me," Zander remarks as they go.

"I've got some ointment in a drawer back at the hotel," Jahura answers absently.

"No, not that kind of niggle. You signed that order, but you obviously didn't remember signing it. Our daughter dear shows up with just what we need and neither of us recalls asking for it. Plus she's having a conversation with us that we don't know our side of. If you follow me."

"Yes," Jahura says. "There's obviously a temporal discontinuity involved here, apart from the really big one of the hotel being several centuries early. At some point, when things have calmed down a bit and we're organised, I will sign that order, one of us will call Lethiel, and whatever she was talking about will be happening. Since there's nothing else we can do about it, I'd say best not to worry at this stage. Excuse me sir," she continues in Latin, and goes into the spiel Zander has worked out, while he does likewise with a middle-aged woman towing two children.

When all the inflatables have been placed (along with Zander's eight dummies, because "I'm not lugging these all the way back") and as many people as possible have been convinced to relocate, Nyrond and goddess look at each other.

"Have we done enough?" Zander says.

"To save Pompeii from the eruption?" Jahura counters. "Or to assuage our guilt for letting things get so messed up?"

"Either. Both."

"We've done all we can. Sometimes that has to be enough." Jahura sets her teeth. The ground is now shaking continuously, and the air has grown warm and oppressive. "Let's get back and see how they're doing."

[jahura]

Mojave Springs, 20th Aries, 3128 A.D.


"Shields."

"Check."

"Polarizers."

"Check."

"Camouflage."

"Check."

"Atmosphere."

"Check."

"Cabin pressure."

"Check."

"Interface."

Zap. "Ow. Check. I hate that."

"Sound."

There's a hum of feedback over the amphitheater, and the audience below them hush.
"Check. Check. One. Two. Three." Lethiel's sultry voice echoes through the speakers, then a harsh squeal that causes the audience to scream and groan.

"Not again!" Anael growls beside her. It leans into its headset, which looks rather funny on an amorphous red sphere.
"Co-pilot to sound. Six is cranked up to eleven again. Fix it and find out who's doing that. I want their frodding harp."

"Yes, Power." The roadie's voice acknowledges.

Anael glances over at Lethiel beside him. She responds to its sardonic glow with a similar expression of her own and shakes her head.

Anael looks back down at the checklist and taps it with the stylus.

"Viewers."

"Check," Lethiel replies as she watches the slight flashes of color on each viewer.

"Lights."

The lights dim slightly and then go back up to full brightness.

"Check."

Anael's halo shimmers.
"Coordinates set and locked in. All systems go."

Lethiel's eyes glance down at the ten empty seats in the V.I.P. section. She sighs with apprehension.

"It's their choice, kid." Anael assures her, "and not their only option. They'll be fine."

Lethiel nods, but isn't entirely convinced. Moreover, she worries her mother would be upset by their nonattendance. She readies herself in her seat and grabs tightly onto the receptors.

"Showtime." She sighs, "cue intro."

The High Path shimmers on center stage, and Jahura Nyrond, dressed in an elaborate cobalt sequined goddess gown, greets the anticipating crowd with welcoming arms.

---

Pompeii, 23 November, 79 A.D.

Seemingly as if a cue, the moment Hamil says, "now", four of the five Ara group together some of the tables in the pub while the fifth Ara fetches a roll of [meat-packing] paper from the kitchen.Hamil bends down on one knee and whispers into the ear bud of Z, who nods and waddles off, then returns shortly with a wingful of colored markers. Tor the Ara lifts Z onto the table, and the markers are distributed amongst them while Tir rolls the paper out to cover the surface of the table. A cacophony of jargon, clicks, growls, and whistles follow as each of them scribble mathematical formulae and crude diagrams to illustrate their ideas.

Speedy watches for a moment, fascinated, until it occurs to her what's wrong with the picture. She pushes her way into the circle and looks down at the paper.

"You guys don't really know what you're doing, do you?" She says, shaking her head.

"To be honest," Tir admits, "we've never actually had to use a cryocooler this big before, much less build one."

Hamil's palms rest against the surface of the table. He gazes at Speedy with his dark red eyes. She finds the color unsettling, but does not avert his gaze.

"Twentieth or twenty-first?" Hamil asks.

"I assume you're asking what century we're from?"

Hamil nods.

"Twenty-first." She answers.

"Right, so you have a cryocooler capable of phasing some particles, maybe a couple at a time at most, but not enough to phase something of this size without making a crater of a continent in the process. Plus the lack of electrical output here thanks to the confirmation forces us to jury-rig a generator for power."

Speedy looks back at Hamil with a questioning glance, then down at the scribble on the table. Something catches her attention, and she nudges the Ara next to her. She holds out her wing, and the Ara - reading her intent - hands over his marker to her.

"Guys, I see a problem, here. In order to achieve the necessary joules you're going to have to compensate for..." She starts scribbling numbers and symbols over the equation Hamil had drawn earlier as she continues to speak. I didn't go to some of the best schools in the country and study engineering for nothing. The other heads take note and a chorus of aaaaaah in comprehension resounds.

[T.O.O.O.]

Josem had picked up the unconscious form of Cannax and carried her defiantly towards the soldiers. With the crowd watching, they weren't sure what to do.


******************************************


Oof!


Murinna found herself rolling in the grass. There was evidence of some kind of camp here, but they had moved on. Now what do I do?


Being amphibious, she wasn't too worried about drying out, but without legs, she could starve out here. I'm not going to cry. I'm not! But the tears of frustration came anyways. She took a few deep breaths. He needs my help! They need my help! I can't give up now!


She looked around. A few more deep breaths to calm her nerves. She closed her eyes and concentrated. Slow…deep…slow…deep…. Water!


She slowly turned her head from side to side to find the direction of the scent. Then, she dragged herself inch by painful inch across the grasses towards the stream.


Soon, she found herself facing a leather boot. She looked up, and saw the boot was attached to a soldier. Trying not to panic, she inched her way backwards. Maybe he won't see me in this tall grass. Maybe I can get around him--


The soldier knelt down. "Well, what do we have here? Hey boys!" he called to his companions. "We got us a real live mermaid! So, what's a pretty little thing like you doing so far from water, hmm?"


Murinna slumped in resignation.

[Zander Nyrond]

"How's it going?" Zander says as he and Jahura enter the kitchen.

"If one more person says that..." Speedy begins in a dangerous growl.

"Your daughter was just here," Hugh says, "offering us ringside seats to watch the destruction! Honestly, of all the tasteless, insensitive, inhuman--"

One of the Ara raises a tentative hand. "Actually," it says, "it sounded like kind of fun."

"Well," Zander says, "it would mean not being frozen along with the hotel."

"I'd rather take my chances," Hugh says disgustedly. "Or if I had that kind of resources, why not go back to the original plan and stop the eruption? All right, you've saved a few, but--"

"The eruption is part of your history," Hamil says, looking up from his work, "and an important strategic advance for our cause. Quarl and I have debated this a great length, so if you don't mind, can we--ouch--take it as read that the eruption will not be cancelled, and also that I really hate fleshies."

"Well," Jahura says, "we don't know anything more about what Lethiel was doing than you do, but it's true that you would be safer elsewhere."

"Our idea was to put anyone who was still here into the Library," Quarl says tentatively. "That's elsewhere."

"It's also technically an illegal hack," Hamil adds, "and anyone of less than Goddess rank would be facing some serious inquiries when this is over. But yes, you can use it."

"If anyone else is staying, I'll stay with them," Hugh says. "I can't be comfortable hiding in a safe place knowing what's happening out there."

Hamil catches Quarl's eye and mouths he-ro behind Hugh's back.

"Let's put it to the vote," Zander says.

"Quickly," Hamil puts in.

"Humans, avians and Ara, the question is: would you rather hide in the Library, go to a theatre and watch thousands burn live on stage, or stay here and be frozen? Speak now or, erm, don't."

[T.O.O.O.]

Murinna tried to back away from the four burly men leering over her. "Well, boys," said the obvious leader, "what shall we do with this little bauble?"


"She would make a good present for the King," the one with the thick blonde moustache suggested. "I'm sure he would be very generous with his gold for such a creature."


Their leader nodded. "We shall take her with us."


Now, the problem with bringing along a mermaid is that, first of all, she's very slippery, even for four brawny soldiers. Even if they could get a purchase on that tail, they couldn't keep it for long, and soon their leader would be knocked to the ground, with a mermaid on top of his chest. Also, how would they get her on a horse? She'd simply keep sliding off!


They could try grabbing her under her arms and dragging her along - if they didn't mind constantly throwing out their backs in the process. Perhaps a makeshift litter tied to the back of a horse - if they had the materials to build one. Trees tend to be few and far between in the prairie.


"Well," the leader finally conceded, "I'm out of ideas."


Another drew his sword. "I say, despatch her and be done with it!"


"No!" The leader ordered. "She is of no use to us dead. So, what then shall we do with our fishy friend here, eh?"


Murinna rolled her eyes. "Oh, honestly!"


That certainly took them by surprise. "She speaks!"


"Well, of course I do!" she snapped. "I can even speak that muttering you call a language. And I do have a name, you know. My name is Murinna!"

[Zander Nyrond]

The silence draws out into infinity...

"OH FOR SHEOL'S SAKE!!!" Quarl explodes. "What is WRONG with you people? Are you deaf, crazy or just stupid? Watch this fleshie's lips moving. YOU ARE ALL PROBABLY GOING TO DIE IF YOU DO NOT, EACH OF YOU, MAKE A DECISION. There's no time left. We have to do it NOW or your precious hotel burns. What's the matter with you?"

"We're waiting for Speedy," the penguins chorus.

"I'm waiting for everyone else," Speedy says.

"I'm not going to be the first," says Zander.

"Oh, I was waiting for you," Jahura says.

"I've told you," says Hugh. "I'm not leaving if anyone else is staying."

An Ara raises a hand. "We're kind of more used to being told what to do."

Hamil clutches his forehead and slowly pulls his hand down over his face. Quarl is beating his head softly against the wall. "All right," says Hamil very softly. "You all want somebody else to take responsibility, is that it? How polite. Well, by a lucky chance, taking responsibility is what we're best at. Ten-HUT!!!"

At once everyone in the room snaps to attention.

"Your stupid hair gel doesn't affect all our powers, you see," Hamil continues. "On the command GO, you will each take one of these tickets and utter the words 'Take me there.' You will do this because I personally think it will be a salutary experience for you, it might remind you that you are not put into this Omniverse to sit around arguing about who's in charge or whose god is the biggest, someone has gone to a great deal of trouble to arrange it and I wouldn't like to disappoint her, and it is also actually going to be quite a spectacular sight and one you will probably be telling your great-grandchildren about when we are still working off the black marks we're going to get on our record for this fiasco. Personally I will be just as happy if, saving your presence Goddess, we never see any of your faces again as long as we endure, but I doubt we'll be so fortunate. Push the ****on, Max--I mean Quarl. Ready? GO!!!"

Moving like automata, everyone complies, the last sound they hear being the sound of Speedy's precious freezer motor spinning up into anguished overdrive.

Then, suddenly and without any fuss, they are all sitting in plush, comfortable seats in a darkened auditorium, gazing at a resplendent figure in a sequined blue gown standing on a stage.

[T.O.O.O.]

"Now, look here, girl--"


"I just told you - my name is Murinna, not 'Girl'. Now, I imagine somewhere in your belongings you have a blanket or a tarpaulin?"


The soldiers looked at each other. "Well, yes, of course--"


"Then what are you waiting for! Go get it! Tch, honestly!"


The leader eyed her suspiciously. "What do you want with a blanket?"


"If you bring it here, I'll tell you!" She shook her head. "Honestly, it's no wonder you became soldiers - you're not much good at anything else!"


The leader raised a finger in re****al, but ended up waving the finger uselessly in the air. Soon one of the others returned with a blanket. "Now," she told them, "Lay it on the ground next to me. Well, go on!"


With the blanket next to her, she rolled over on to it. "Now," she told them, "if you pick up the blanket, you can carry me between two of you!" She shook her head in disbelief. "Honestly!"

[jahura]

Quarl slips off its fleshie and lets it fall to the floor of the pub.
"That was impressive."

Hamil does the same, picks them up, and hurls the stinking disguises out the front door.
"Sometimes you just have to know how to talk to them." Hamil replies, "and what their limits are."

"I pray she'll appreciate it." Quarl adds, "she didn't seem too happy."

"You have to remember the Jahura we just encountered is still a newbie." Hamil explains, "look how she talked to those mortals - like they were equals."

Quarl nods in consideration. "Yeah, that was kind of weird. So where to, next?"

Hamil produces another envelope.
"Coordinates '31° 11' 53" North, 29° 55' 9" East' 365 A.D. Document rescue before the tsunami hits."

"Righteous!" Quarl barrel rolls as the High Path shimmers them away. "I always wanted to see Egypt."

---

Mojave Springs, 20th Aries, 3128 A.D.

"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen!" Jahura starts when the applause dies down, "I am Jahura, and I would like to welcome you all to this leg of our Ultimate Disaster Tour! Tonight's journey is to the latter of the First Century, to a booming seaside resort once known as Pompeii!" She pauses for more applause.

A tall man dressed in 18th century dark clothing and wearing a bandit mask over his eyes appears beside Hugh's seat in the aisle. He is holding a large sack about four feet in length and hands it over to Hugh.
"Would you be so kind as to take one and pass the rest down the row?" The masked man asks in a distinctly Nyrond Brit dialect, "I would very much appreciate it." He lifts the dark tricorn off of his head and bows deeply, then vanishes. Hugh's eyes dart about the arena and note similarly dressed fellows proceeding down the aisles with identical sacks, each handing a sack over to the aisle seater and making the same request, and the same hat-tipping and bowing gesture when the sacks are recieved.

"What is that?" Tem asks, sitting next to him.

Hugh opens the sack and finds inside ten plastic vuvuzelas. With an expression of distaste he draws one out of the sack as Tem makes a grab for it. Tem also pulls one out and passes the sack down to his neighbor Ara. By the time the sack reaches the penguins, the three birds are bouncing in their seats with excitement while Speedy hisses admonitions to them to calm down.

Many of the audience members, however, believing it to be part of the show, have begun to test their instruments regardless of decorum and etiquette. Soon the amphitheatre is buzzing with the infernal noise, drowning out Jahura until she is merely moving her lips and gesturing her way through her lines. The Ara and the penguins join in the din with their own contributions eagerly.

---

"That was appalingly passive-agressive, even for you and your brothers!" Jahura snaps. She twists open the jar of cold cream with more force than actually needed and slaps the substance on various points of her face.

Zander leans back against the wall, still dressed in his Scarlet Pimpernel getup, and defiantly crosses his arms with a facetious grin.

"Not to mention rude!" She continues as she leans in further toward the mirror and slaps a second layer over her face. "Rude, rude, rude! I've never been so embarrassed in all my life!" She grabs a towel from the side of the dressing table and vigorously rubs her face.

"Sorry to spit in your spotlight," Zander replies, "but I made my point quite clear all the way through this abomination of an idea. You wouldn't listen once you latched on so my only recourse was to drown you out."

"Abomination!" Jahura throws the towel onto the table. "Abomination!" She whirls around in her chair to face him. "You who have eked your existence for eons robbing from the rich, who have seduced countless nubile souls and left them to their own, who have plotted and ployed to change the political atmospheres of galaxies infiltrating one planet at a time, you call this an abomination! Check that beam, sweetheart! I'm just doing what all Nyronds have done since their exodus began! How dare you judge me!"

"None of our coups have involved watching people die for entertainment." His tone is flat and seething.

Jahura grits her teeth. "If I explained once, I explained it ten thousand times, that's their choice. You were there. They were duly warned it would happen and they chose to die of their own free will. Everyone in that audience knows what will happen, so no surprise there. They paid that exhorbitant amount to see it and they are entitled to get their money's worth! Plus, the money goes to charity! How can you even argue with the concept?"

"When you hand over blood money to a charity, you taint it." Zander growls, "I remember once someone much like you saying the same thing not too long ago."

Jahura stands up, slowly. She takes the towel from the tabletop in her hand and floats over to the hamper, dropping the towel into it. She turns to Zander with a scowl.

"She's grown up since then." Jahura snarls as she heads out of the dressing room.

[Zander Nyrond]

t: Oh, thank you!!!

Meanwhile, in the stalls...

Zander finally succeeds in securing the last of the vuvuzelas from a protesting penguin and returns to his seat while the tinnitus slowly fades to a dull roar. Most of the patrons have now grown bored with their toys, and only a few desultory yawps from particularly determined funsters now break the expectant hush.

"There's something very wrong here," he says.

Jahura says nothing. She is staring at the space where her other self had stood. Her lips move silently.

"If I'm not mistaken, that was a bunch of Nyronds deliberately sabotaging the performance, which might indicate--darling? Hello?"

"I don't understand," Jahura says. "Bowing to the Will is one thing. Making a spectacle of it...have I--will I change that much?"

"Everything changes, even immortals," Zander says. "When I was younger I would have thought nothing of staging something like this. Natural deaths, unavoidable, already part of history..." He stops abruptly, and his face pales. "Of course that no longer applies to these deaths," he continues with an effort at calm, "because I did try to prevent them...and maybe I could have tried harder...maybe I failed because I--because--"

Jahura takes him in her arms. "No," she says urgently. "You did everything you could. We both did. The people who didn't accept our help chose their fate."

"Not an informed choice," Zander says into her shoulder. "I should have made them believe me. That's what I'm supposed to be good at." He takes a deep breath and draws away a little. "I'm all right," he says. "Just a little discombobulated. I'll get through it. I must do."

"Can't you just do what you did when you were younger?"

Zander smiles. "I've grown up since then," he says, as the lights go down and the other Jahura strides back on to the stage, while behind her the masive screen slowly begins to brighten.