I think I should warn you: The next chapter will be nothing but doom and gloom, with a complete lack of rubber chickens to use for medicinal purposes.

Since Jerhico is not working on his story at all I figure you all need some fan fiction to fill that gap in your life that nothing else seems to be able to do. Once again, I must warn you of the impending danger that you face if you are afraid of butterflies and the night sky.



Jade and G went down a vent shaft to a monorail transfer station. After quietly dispatching the guard they activated the monorail. Jade boarded first, and then all of a sudden iorn bars slammed down before G could board. "Ill meet you at the next stop," Jade said. "Okeay, be careful," G replied. The monorail flew off into the dark, and Jade and G were seperated. The monorail stuttered halfway through, and came to a screeching halt over a deep, dark, black precipice. Then the rail shuttered, bent, and collapsed. The car fell into the precipice and was never seen again.



THE END!!!1



Or not...
Jade managed to jump out of the window and grab hold of the rail before the car dissapeared into the blackness. "That was too close," she quietly said to herself, and she slowly shimmeyed down the rail to the next station. She contacted G at the terminal. "G, the rail collapsed. I barely made it out. Well have to meet up later," she said into the comm station. "All right. Just dont go get yourself killed while my back is turned," he replied. "Nuthin to worry about!" she replied with confidence. She then made her way towards the central room that was to be their meeting place. After sneaking by or dispatching a few guards through a few rooms, she entered one room where the door suddenly slammed shut and alarms went off. The room quickly filled with guards who demanded her surrender. She instead jumped into a vent shaft as fast as she could, with lazer blasts hitting all around and inside it. She crawled for a little while until she came upon a weak paneling and it collapsed underneath her. She fell through the cieling, and right into G's arms. "Wow, nice catch!" She said. "Oh! thanks!" he replied. after a few seconds, she smiled and asked, "um, can I get down, now?" G, slightly embarrased, said "Huh? OH! Sure!" and put her down.


They continued until they found a room that looked like the inside of a factory, with conveyers running and machines working, moving boxes and crates around. They noticed an eerily familiar green aura, and a feeling of dread overcame them. Two Imperial Guards walked past the vent they were hiding in; their eyes followed those two guards right up to a group of Alpha Sections. "Oh God! What are they doing here?" G asked. "I dont know, but it cant be good!" Jade replied. "Jade! Dont you always carry around a camera?" G asked. "Good idea," she replied. She took some pictures; after the third picture, she felt something overcome her. Her eyes started to glow green, and she slowly turned her head to face one of those giant DomZ eye monster things. She heard its voice in her head and was hypnotized by it. "Jade? Jade?" G asked, but she wasnt listening. The guards took notice of the disturbance, they went to where the monster was looking. "Time to go, Jade!" g said as he pulled her away and broke her hypnotic state. They got a safe distance away and G asked "What happened, Jade?"
"It was calling me... I couldnt stop it!" She replied. "I tried, but I couldnt brake away..." she continued. "Hey, dont worry about it, lets just get to the rendevouz point!" G said.


They made it to the rendevouz point, where the brilliant mind known as Thunderpants asked "Where have you been?" jade replied "Weve been busy. We saw the Alpha Sections and the DomZ here!" Jade continued. "We saw them, too!" Said Double H. "We also noticed a high ranking Alpha officer conversing with the emperor himself!" he continued. "So these guys are in league with the butchers. Thats just wonderful!" Pants said. "Well, we have one mission and one alone. To find that map! So lets make like eggs and scramble!" Pants continued. "Scramble like eggs? How long did you work on that one?" Marcus asked. "I think these things up on the fly, so lets make like a tree and get the frick out of here! Notice the perfectly located censorship on that last one." Pants said. They made their way to the control room and entered. There they located the maps whereabouts. Those whereabouts turned out to be right in the computer databanks they were accessing at the moment. Using Peyjs erginomic outlet, they downloaded the map into his armputer, and escaped from the control room.

Their way out went through the dungeon of the palace. It was there that something caught Marcus' eye. "Guys, stop!" He said, as they looked down from the saftey of their balcony to the torture chamber below. A beautiful young woman, with dark skin, black hair, and brown eyes was tied down to a chair. "Now suppose we put out those pretty little eyes of yours, then would you tell us how to find the rebels?" the torturer asked her. "Youd have to cut my head off and download the information from my brain!" she replied. "We have to do something!" Marcus demanded. "We have what we came for, were getting out of here!" Pants said. "Oh come on! Its only a matter of time before they break her! Dont you have any humanity left, or did you giggle it away in all of your stupidity?" He demanded. "...Fine! Jade, G, Hold up down below on the left and take out the torture guy! Peyj, Double H, clear the path ahead! Marcus, get down their and untie her! Ill draw the torture dude out!" Pants ordered. "How ya gonna do that?" Jade asked. Pants just smiled micheviously.

The torturer was about to give the young woman a good zapping with a cattle prod thing when he heard a voice in the distance. "Oh, my! Somebody help me! Im a catholic schoolgirl, trapped in this ventilation shaft! Im cold and wet and half naked and stuck in a highly comprimising position!" It was Pants. The torturer said "Ill deal with you later! Come out where I can see you!"
"Oh, but I cant! I need a big strong man like you to come and grease me up!" Pants said. As the guard moved towards the source of the disturbance, Marcus appeared behind the girl and said "Shh! Its okeay! Im here to help!" the girl said "Well you took your sweet time getting here!" Marcus untied her and she turned around to see him. Marcus was amazed at who he saw. "Kiera?!" He gasped. "Marcus?!" She gasped. GASP!!!!1 Anyway, Jade and G took care of the guard swiftly and opened the door to the torture chamber, letting Marcus and Kiera out. They linked up with Peyj and Double H. "Quickly! I noticed a landing pad ahead! We can commandeer one of their shuttles and escape!" Double H said.

They made their way to the shuttle pad, which was supposedly abandoned. "Theyre going to notice a missing shuttle," Kiera said. "Dont worry, if planned for all contingencies!" Pants said. "Except this one..." he corrected himself as dozens of guards surrounded them. "Put down your weapons!" They ordered. Marcus looked at Pants, and Pants looked at Marcus. They took aim and opened fire with their assult rifles. "Get on the ship! Go!" Pants screamed to the others. "All right, Marc! Were gettin' outta heah! Cover me while I move!" he screamed to Marcus. "Gotcha covered!" Marcus screamed back as he layed down suppresing fire for Pants to move back. Pants then extended the same courtesy to Marcus, and they bounded back to their new ship. "GET THIS BIRD IN THE AIR!" Pants screamed to the cockpit, and the shuttle roared up into the dark night.

Back on the pad, a dark figure said to the guards in a deep, scratchy, half mechanical voice, "Let them go! Theyll lead us to an even LARGER prize!"


Could it be? Has Kheck returned to haunt our heroes? ... Yeah, probably. If this thought frightens you, I reccomend you go get some sunlight, as youve been playing too many videogames. Maybe go jog? While youre doing that you can think about dancing monkeys!

That wasn't very unexpected, was it? So I'll just stay here and continue playing games.

quote:

Maybe go jog?

Going outside? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is some crazy ****. But its extremely funny, you seriously need proffesional help, preferably from a lawyer as this stuff is going to give someone a heart condition they'll be luaghing so much.

I know you all hate this - so do I, but please don't bypass the autocensor :s

This message has been edited. Last edited by: jasminam,

Fine, Ill post a warning, the way I do before every segment: If you have a condition in any of the following body parts:
Heart
Kidneys
Liver
Spine
Colon
Weenus
Fingernails
It is highly advised that you go see a doctor.

What kind of doctor? Or should we just go straight to a Mortician

Yeah, call a mortician, because as youll notice, Im dead. Talk about necroposting! Anyway, I figure I might as well continue my story, as its saturday morning and the only thing to do is watch infomercials for two more hours. Caught the Colts losing to the Falcons in Tokyo, though, so that was worth it.



Escaping the Palace...

Escaping the Palace in a blaze of gunfire, the shuttle carrying our heroes stays low to avoid radar contact. "That was way too close," Jade said in relief. "Yeah, a hot LZ is never fun," Marcus agreed. "Everyone all right?" Pants asked. Everyone gave their conformation. Jade flew the shuttle to an open square in the slums, which took up most of the city. When they dismounted the shuttle, they were mortified by the sight surrounding them. Collapsing shanties, grime, waste, and dead bodies littered the pockmarked streets. The air was barely breathable. Ghost figures wandered about, scattering from the crew of the shuttle. "My God..." G said, shaken. "This is how most people are treated by the emperor. You dont have enough money, you arent of the right political views, you wind up here. Petty theft just to stay alive is a crime punishable by death, here. Usually they just sit back on the parapets of the walls guarding the upper class districts and watch you die, but sometimes they come down here to expidite the process," Marcus explained. "I can see why theres a resistance," Pants observed. They moved out into the filth, and began looking for a place to hide. Some little children snuck up behind them and tried to pickpocket them. Jade looked down to find a little hand rustling through her pocket, looking for anything. "This is just pitiful. Here, take this," Pants said, as he handed them a MRE. Their faces lit up and they ran off. "I always keep extra supplies ready in my little digi-pack thing, just in case," Pants said. They moved a bit further, and G was grabbed by the arm by someone hiding in the darkness holding a gun. "Youre with IRIS, right?" The man said. "Yes, who are y-" Jade started. "No time for talk, lets move!" the man ordered, and they followed him to a secret tunnel entrance.


He guided them through the tunnel system right to the IRIS den. "Good to see you all alive again... Kiera?! They found you?!" The commander said. "Yeah, I guess I got lucky," Kiera replied. "This day is getting better by the minute! You found the map and saved the princess all in one swoop!" The commander joyfully declared. "Waitaminute... princess?" Pants asked. "Yes, Princess Kiera, the daughter of the true king of Arjuun. Shes been helping us for quite some time, now," the commander explained. "Well, its nice to be makin' youre aquaintences, youre magnificentness!" Pants declared. "Dont. call. me. that." Kiera ordered. "Can I call you Youre Royal Wonderfulness?" Pants asked. "...No" Kiera bluntly replied. Pants continued "Well Id like for you to meet my contraceptive. I call it 'Youre Holyness,'". Jade interrupted by introducing herself and her companions. "Now, lets get to that map," She said. But before they could even begin the analasys they heard explosions in the distance. "Gorg, find out what that is!" The commander said to a big, brown, bison- like charicter, who fiddled around with some controls and brought up a live feed cam of the slums. Guards and Alpha Sections were rampaging through the streets, killing everyone who got in their way, setting fires to the shanties and lining up civilians for random executions, following the exact path that Jade & Co. took. "They must have bugged the map! Everyone evacuate!" The commander ordered.

But before they could even start, Alpha Sections burst through one of the doors and opened fire. The IRIS soldiers stationed around the den returned fire, and a battle broke out right in the room. "EVERYBODY GET THROUGH THE BLAST DOOR!" Pants screamed. "Marcus! stay close to me!" he yelled as he dragged Marcus behind the hologram table. "Jade! Get everybody out! We'll cover you!" Marcus screamed. They took potshots at the enemy force that was developing in the room. The IRIS troops were slowly being killed, one by one, staining the silver metal paneling with their blood. Soon all of the survivors, save Marcus and Pants, were through the blast door. Pants yelled "GO, MARCUS! IVE GOT YA COVERED!" as he stood up and fired. Marcus ran through the blast door and turned around to cover Pants' retreat. "Comeon, Pants!" he screamed. Pants turned around and ran for the door. But he got shot in the back and fell to his knees as the exit wound opened up in his shoulder. Another shot passed through his gut, and slowly oozed blood. Blood came up into his mouth as he kneel in place, staring blankly at Jade and company. An Alpha Section came up behind him and slowly raised its pistol to his head. He let out one gurgled scream as the door closed: "GOOOOOOO!" The door slammed shut and one last shot rang out from within the room.

"Lets go..." Marcus said, and they turned and ran through the sewers with the rest of the survivors.

They came out in the woods and made a break for the shuttle that they had crashed onto the planet in. "Come on! Get this thing working! Were dead if it wont fly!" Marcus said. "Just a few more things, and, THERE!" Peyj yelled. "Everybody on!" Jade yelled, and everyone left piled into the shuttle. They escaped orbit, and then had to make it out of the minefield, which gives rise to a minigame in which you have to shoot the mines and the incoming fighters to keep the ship running. They make it away from Arjuun, and head back to Hyllis.

"What happened...?" Jade asked no one in particular. "They must have bugged us, somehow..." G said. "It was me. They bugged me. Its somewhere under my skin, I cant find it..." Kiera said. "Im sorry," she continued. "Its not youre fault," Jade reassured her. "I cant believe it. So many people, dead... even Pants," Jade said. "Thats war, I guess..." G replied. "Pants died with the others because he believed in something, and the only way to honor his memory is to keep fighting for that belief," Double H said.

In the shattered IRIS den, the Alphas were cleaning up when an evil figure showed up. Half his face was replaced with machinery, with a bright red glowing left eye. "Excellent Work!" The dreaded General Kheck said. "Now, all we have to do is lead them to the next map pieces!" he continued, laughing as he watched the shuttle on the holotable fly away from Arjuun.


Oh, darnit! I killed off my own character in my own story! Dont worry, my memory will live on through the lives I touched! I was kind of hoping someone might have been gullable enough to fall for that prank. But as for the story, just stay tuned, as it will continue without me. As a character, of course.

I can see no one is interested in fanfiction anymore.

Ive got nothing to do right now, so I think Ill do a bit more of my story. I dont care if you want to read it, I want to share!


Jade, G, Double H, Peyj, Marcus, Kiera, and the rest of the survivors of the attack landed safely on Hyllis. Jade led the group to the IRIS headquarters to debrief and to get medical attention for the wounded.

After telling the story of the attack to Hahn, Jade informed him of the overall success of the mission. "So, Pants is dead. That is some of the worst news Ive heard today. He was one of our best, and his skills will be sorely missed where youre going next," Hahn said. "Why? Where are we going?" Jade asked. "To Arcadia. It is cold, snowed in, heavily forested, and mountainous. Just the enviornment Pants trained for. Plus, he grew up in a very similar place," Hahn said. "The map leads us there, next. We believe that it is plotting points off of different systems from which the location of the DomZ homeworld can be triangulated," Hahn said. "Youre next mission is to go there and find the map. The Arcadian government is friendly to us, and there are no Alphas known about on the planet, so it should be a simple snach and grab operation. But it rarely works out that way. Good luck," Hahn said. "Well do our best," said Jade, and they went off to Mamago Garage to pick up the Beluga.

"Hahaha! Welcome back!" Hal said as they drove in on the hovercraft. "Youre ready! Were terribly sorry about that engine, we had it fixed!" he continued. "Dont sweat it, its no big deal," Jade said. "Well, it looks like its time to go," said Jade. But before they could load up into the refurbrished Beluga, Hahn appeared from inside and stopped them. "Jade, before you go, you better have this. Its Pants' log; he kept information on every planet he visited in this. It might be useful, especially where youre going. He spent quite some time on Arcadia, so hes got a lot of information about it in here. He also made a few friends durring his stay; that should make things even easier," Hahn said. "Thank you, this will help alot," Jade said. After Hahn left, she looked it over. "Wow, he went to a lot of places," Jade said. "It seems he was thinking ahead, in case someone else needed the information," Double H thought out loud. "Well, we arent going to get to use this info if we dont get there first! Lets go!" Peyj said. They piled into the Beluga and flew off.



Arriving on Arcadia...

Arriving on Arcadia, the first thing they noticed was how incredibly cold it was. Marcus clinged onto Kiera to keep her warm, and she lightly smiled at him. G and Jade snuggled in close and penguin walked inside of the landing bay. Double H and Peyj were on their own. Do'H! Inside the landing bays main hallway, they were approached by a salesman offering heavy winter coats. They bought some, and made their way out to the town. It was a small fishing town, with cottages, docks, boats out in the oecean despite the blistering cold gathering fish, and red brick buildings scattered about. "Well, we might as well find someone who knows the place to give us a tour," Jade said. She took out Pants' log, and read it. "Theres a bar nearby where we can rent transportation," Jade said. "Do ya think we could find a tourgide there?" G asked. "Well find out soon enough," Jade said.

In the bar, it was dark, grungy, and smelled of beer and cigarettes. The patrons were all leather faced fishermen and mountain men. Jade didnt feel uneasy, though, as it all seemed to have a friendly, welcoming air to it. She went up to the bar and spoke to the bartender. "Excuse me, I was wondering if I could rent some transportation," She said to him. "Oh, of course, young miss! I dont believe Ive seen you around these parts, before!" He said warmly. "No, Im from out of town," She replied. "Well, dont be gettin shy, now! What be youre name?" He asked. "Im Jade. And this is Peyj, Double H, G, Kiera, and Marcus," She replied. "A pleasure to meet you all! To bad me ol' buddy, who we called 'Pants, isnt here to meet ya! Lynx-O be my name! And this heah is me bah! Yeah, it is truly a shame he aint heah, he loves a new face!" the bartender said. (Well, Lynx asked to be in it, so here he is). "Actually, we did meet him. He cant be here today," Marcus interrupted. "Ye met him?! Well, whatsa mattah? Why cant he be heah?" Lynx asked. "...hes dead. Fighting the Alpha Sections..." Jade said. "...Dead...? Are ye sure?" Lynx asked. "...We saw him die, we couldnt do anything," Jade said, feeling suddenly sad and guilty for his death. "Well, he deserves some recognition. EVERYBODY STOP WHAT YER DOIN! Some terrible news has reached my eahs. Ouah friend and brothah, Thundahpants, is dead from battle with the Alpha Sections! A toast, to ouah fallen brothah, Pants!" Everyone in the bar raised their glasses in salute, and had a moment of silence. "Now, what brings ya heah, because I feel theah be moah to youah visit than just to tell us the bad news," Lynx said afterwords. "Weve come looking for a star map, or at least a fragment of one, that leads somewhere very important. The last segment we found led us here," Jade said. "Well, I dunna know about any stah map thing that leads anywheah in paticulah, but theah is a cave just a few miles out, in the mountians, that seems to have a weahd enehgey comin from it," Lynx said. "I could give you about three snowmobiles, should be enough," he continued. "Thank you, that helps alot," Jade said.

They found the three snowmobiles outside. They went two to a ride, Peyj with Double H, G with Jade, and Kiera with Marcus. They zipped out to the cave, and towards what they thought should be a simple enough operation. They would soon find out that they were sorely mistaken...


What could possibly be the sore mistake? Is it the same as a rash mistake? Find out next time!

quote:

Caught the Colts losing to the Falcons in Tokyo, though, so that was worth it.

Argh! How dare you! Im from Indiana, I'm a colts fan, and any attack on the Colts is a direct attack on my person! You better be glad you're dead thunderpants, cuz if not I would have finished the job!









...ok, I'm better now. Your team of preference?

Im a Pats fan, myself. AND Ill have you know that while I was alive I was a varsity lineman on my high school football team. I have since then lost 45 pounds and am no longer able to play that position, plus Im dead. But Ill have you all know that I was good when I was fat and alive!

Your writing seems very good for a dead guy. Its also got a more grim than before, don'tr try to turf me out, I'm the one with the dark, gritty story. OR as dark and gritty as you can make BGE.

Dont worry, it will continue getting darker until a miracle happens that will make the funny more satisfying, if you ask me.

I think I will continue with my story, now. On to Chapter next: The Crazy Cave Adventure.


When they entered the cave, the first thing they noticed was how incredibly warm it was inside. "We should leave our winter gear here, or we will certainly overheat within," Double H said. "Imagine the irony of dying of a heat injury in the middle of winter," Marcus added. They put their heavy winter apparell in a corner where they could find it later, and went into the cave. There were multiple pathways inside, and they were presented with quite a problem. "Hold on! Maybe Pants explored in here before," Jade said. She opened up Pants' log, and investigated. Surely enough, there was a comprehensive map inside of it. The map was covered with markings, higlighting points of interest, and little jolly rogers, marking potential danger zones. A large skull and crossbones sat at the opposite end of the map. "I wonder what was there that worried him so much..." Jade said. "Probably a gigantic ice cave beast with a big hankerin' for pork!" Peyj said. "Well, this place is our best bet for finding that map, so we have to go in," Jade said. They split up into three groups of two and Jade gave out digital copies of the map; Jade with G, Peyj with HH, and Marcus with Kiera. They then went down different corridors, with plans to meet at the large, central skull and crossbones.

The cave was lit up by bioluminescent plants bursting through the ice cristals and small animals of every type. This provided for some entertaining photography for Jade at first. "Look at all these things..." she said to G. "Theyre beautiful," she continued. G looked at Jade, smiled, and said "Ive seen better..." Jade looked at him and smiled back. They kept on moving, pushing ice blocks and crossing ice bridges along the way, until they came upon the first skull and crossbone area of their map. It looked just like any other corridor they went down. "What frightened him about this place?" Jade asked. She moved foreward until she stepped on something soft. It immeadeatly grabbed her foot and came out of the ice. It was a giant worm creature. "JADE!" G yelled. He ran foreward and attacked it. It let go, but two of its friends showed up. After beating them G looked at Jade and said "That was close." Jade replied "Yeah... thanks." and smiled lightly.

They continued on until they came upon a giant precipice, seperating them from their destination. This was the second skull and crossbone on their map. "Well, this is a challenge," G said. "You can say that again," Jade replied. "How did he make it across?" G wondered out loud. Then out of the distance they saw Marcus and Kiera come up on them. Only thing was that they were riding on the back of a large Manta Ray-esque creature. They passed by them and yelled out "Hey guys! Check this out!" and laughed to themselves. "...cute," G said. "What? You dont like cute?" Jade asked. "No, its not that, its just that when theyre together, it gets so syruppy and sweet," He replied. "Well, theyre obviously in love," Jade replied. "How would you act if you were like that?" She asked. "All right, Ill give them that... but what were they laughing about?" he aksed. "Oh, let it go, lets just do what they did and get across," Jade said. A flying manta thingy came to them and they hopped on. Jade had herself a grand old time on the manta thingy, and G couldnt help himself but smile as well. They traversed the gap and continued with their journey.

Once across, Marcus got off first, and helped Jade off. "Why merci, monseniour(SP?)," she said to him. They continued on through the cave, solving little puzzles here and there and taking pictures of the wildlife, until coming across the next danger zone. It was an open cavern with them being on what amounted to a footbridge across it, with several gaps to jump. They moved along through this until some movement on the wall caught their eyes. They stopped and looked around. Then from above them a large flying insect creature attacked, but it was jumped and swallowed whole by a larger four legged spider like creature, with markings that would identify it as a Domz monster. They then had to fight off dozens of these on a narrow section of rock. They would jump on top of G or Jade, and one would have to go help the other fight it off, like the Crochax and Vorax from the original. After they had fought the spiders off, a huge one came up from underneath the walkway. Jade and G ready their staffs and prepare to fight, but shots ring out from the far right wall. One shot after the other came into the massive queen spiders body, until it collapsed. They looked where the shots came from. It was a soldier, all dressed in white, save for the black skimask and goggles, toting an assult rifle. "Who are you?" Jade asked. He raised his hand and winded back, almost as though to say "SUPRISE!" but he was interrupted by an onset of more wildlife. He dissapeared behind an ice formation and they didnt catch sight of him again. "Well, whoever he was he saved our sorry butts. Lets get out of here before more show up," G said, and they got out of dodge.

Jade and G were the first ones to make it to the central area, marked with the biggest jolly roger of the entire map. The whole place was set up almost as though it was an arena, and there were ancient technological instruments all over the walls. In the middle of the arena was a projector on a pedistal, holding nothing other than the second fragment of the star map in its databanks and displaying it for all to see. "Look at this place..." G said. "Its like a giant arena, or a proving ground, or something," Jade added. She looked in the middle and saw the star map. "Look! There it is! Just sitting around!" Jade said. "Hey, donthya think we should wait for the others?" G asked. "Whats the worst that could happen?" Jade asked. "Come on! Didnt you see the size of the warning Pants had on this place? Theres probably a monster or something!" G protested. "Weve made it this far, are you scared?" Jade teased. She took out an mDisk and walked up to the pedistal. It suddenly turned pink and fleshy right under her feet. She looked down in shock and jumped back. The fleshy piece rose out of the ground over twenty feet up. Two arms and two legs with huge claws appeared out of the sides of the large colubm, white fur grew all over the monstrosity, and two eyes popped out and looked hella pissed. "Smooth..." G said, and the beast attacked.

This boss battle plays out as such. The thing shot fire out of its mouth three times and then attacked with its hands. Jade and G attacked the hands in tandem, and this pattern is used twice. Then it started swinging its arms at Jade, which she dodged and then hit it in the armpit. Then finally it tried stomping on them with its feet and shooting fire at the same time. Now Jade and G just led it around until it was shocked by shocky thingies that came out of the wall. When it died, it let go of the obligitory pearl and spat an mDisk with the map on it out. "Awesome! We did it!" G yelled triumphantly. "All right!" Jade added, and they hugged. Then G and Jade stopped, let go, looked at each other, and politely shook hands. "Um, nice work..." Jade said. "Yeah, you too..." G replied. The other four came out of the caverns with their weapons drawn, and saw that Jade and G had already slain the beast. "Well, you two seem to make quite the team," Marcus said. "It was dangerous to start the fight without us, you could have been killed!" Peyj yelled. "My thoughts exactly, but theyre all right, and we should go," Double H said.

Just then, the ground started to shake, and the roof started to come down on them. "Lets get outta here!" Kiera yelled, and they ran to the exit. There was a large slide there, with no way to safely navigate it, save some ancient looking snowboards. "Works for me! Lets go!" Said Peyj, and they all made their way down the slope on the snowboards, bringing back the Tony Hawk type controls. They then found that everything else at the bottom was also collapsing. They saw more of the Manta Ray things and got on them. Then they flew out of the collapsing cave, with fire shooting up from beneath and pieces of ice and rock coming down on them, until they escaped out the mouth of the cave. They dismounted and got on their snowmobiles as fast as they could, forgetting their winter equipment. They drove away into the blinding snowstorm, and Jade and G were quickly seperated from the group, lost, in the snow with now winter jacket, stuck in a withering blizzard.

Do'H! Shoulda remembered the coats! Will they survive the blizzard? Or am I going to be a jerk and end the story here? And who was the mystery man who helped them in the caves? Who knows? Tune in next time to find out!

Again, I continue my story. I want to get as much written down before I go back to school.


After barely escaping from the cave with their lives, Jade and G were seperated from the rest of the group in the witewash blizzard without any winter gear to sustain them. "We arent gonna last long if we dont find shelter! Lets move!" G said, and they drove off on their snowmobile down the mountain. The cold took its toll, as they made their way speeding down the slope, the ice nipping at their faces and limbs.

They hit a hard bump on the slope and their vehicle flipped, throwing them off. "Are you all right?" G asked Jade. "I think so," she replied. "Well, theres got to be some survival gear in this thing! Help me out!" G said. They wrenched the seat off the wreck, and found thermal blankets and flares. "Not much," G said. "Itll have to do!" Jade replied. They quickly wrapped themselves in the blankets and grabbed the flairs. They then continued on foot, slowly making their way down. The cold was becoming unbearable for both of them, and their steps wavered. Jade felt faint and disoriented. "Are ya all right, Jade?" G asked. "Yeah, Im fine..." Jade slowly replied. Little to their knowledge, they were both entering the first stages of hypothermia. They shook uncontrollably from the cold for some time. Jade was the first to stop shivering; her body was giving up on attempting to reheat itself. As they progressed, she slowly started to lose her grip on reality. G looked back and saw her weaving in and out in a zig zaging pattern. "Jade! Hold up!" He screamed back. "Stay with me, Jade!" he continued. "Im fine, Im fine..." she said back. "Are ya sure?" G questioned. "Yeah, lets keep goin'" she replied. They continued on. G was starting to show the same symptoms, when Jade collapsed. "JADE! JADE!" he yelled to no avail. He took off his blanket and wrapped it around Jade, and attempted to carry her. He was too weak to do this properly, so he slung her arm around his shoulder and did the best he could to drag her. He didnt make it far until he had to rest. He collapsed to his knees, ready to give up.

After sitting there for less than a minute, a figure, clad in white, made its way towards them. It was the man from the caves, back to help them. "You... are you the guy from-" Marcus said, interrupted by a harsh 'shh' from the ski-masked soldier. He leaned over to G and whispered "Alpha Sections and Arjuunese Imperial Guards. Three hundred meters at six o'clock!" G couldnt believe what he heard; they had been followed. Luckily the storm had blocked them from view. He quickly cradled the unconcious Jade in his arms and led G down the slope. He walked down directly to what looked to be an old abandoned shed. He brought Jade and G inside, laying Jade down on a bed and sitting G in a chair. He immeadeatly went to work setting a fire. Once the fire was going, he put some slabs of rock in it and started to heat up some snow to make water. He poured some cold water and some hot water in two different pails, and took G's shoes off. Surely enough, his feet had frostbite. "I want you to put your feet in the hot water for ten minutes, then put them in the cold for another ten. Keep on with that cycle until your feet get normal feeling back," The tired trooper wheezed to G. He took out the rocks from the fire, and went to work on Jade. He put two rocks in her armpits and two in her groin. He then soaked a towel in warm water. He lifted up Jades shirt and unzipped her pants and brought them down an inch, exposing her belly, and layed the soaked towel on her stomach. "Heh, pink undies. All right. Drink some of this, and change that towel on her when it gets cold. Ill be outside, guarding the door," the soldier said, handing G a warm drink and walking out of the door.

Jade was in the midst of a terrifying dream. She was in a white room with a single door leading out. As she made her way for the door it dissapeared, and a maniacal cackling laughter filled the air. The walls soon ran red with blood dribbling down their sides, puddling on the floor. The walls soon started closing in, and the laughter became all the more intense. Just as she was to be crushed by the walls, the dream changed. She was back at the lighthouse in the midst of the Alpha Sections attack when they captured the children. No matter what she did, she had no effect on what was happening. Then, as she watched the Alphas ship leave, she turned around and saw General Kheck, laughing heartily, with an evil looking Thunderpants standing by his side, cackling with him. Then Jade woke up.

"Jade! Youre all right!" G said. "Yeah... thanks."She replied. "Dont thank me, thank the guy that saved us," G said back. "Who? Who saved us?" She asked. "Hes right outside-"G said as the soldier burst in the door and stamped out the fire. "Quick! My snowmobile is outside! Take it and get the hell out of here! Theyre coming!" He frantically whispered. "Who?" Jade asked. "Alphas and Imperial Guards! They followed us!" G replied.

Outside, about 150 meters from the cabin, the evil figure standing next to Kheck in Jades dreams said "Get the girl! I dont care about the other two!" And with that, the Alphas and Guards moved in. A Thunderpants clone was leading the attack. The Extra Villianous and Ingeniously Ludicris clone system was designed for the Alphas and DomZ by the dastardly evil scientist Dr. Brakezurballz, who was later executed to keep the programs intracacies secret. EVILPants was the first succesful EVIL clone created. Just as the Alphas and Guards moved in, shots rang out from the cottage and mowed down three of them.

Jade and G got on the snowmobile and called out for the soldier. "Come on! Get over here!" Jade yelled to him. "We gotta go!" G added. The soldier just turned to face them and screamed a single word: "GOOOOOOOO!" And kept on fighting. Jade and G hesitated a bit before zipping off. Then they began their daring descent. Along the way, they were hounded by Alphas on snowmobiles ambushing them at passes and chasing after them, and Alpha ships harrasing them from the air. They went under rock formations, off big jumps, through collapsing trees, and over massive explosions, zigzagging their way through a forest that seemed to come alive with lazer blasts; the very ground was roaring to life with the explosions, taking on the properties of a massive, vile creature trying to swallow them whole. They were soon met by Double H and Peyj. "Where have ya been! Weve been looking for you!" Peyj said as they joined in in the great snowmobile chase. Marcus and Kiera soon found them. "Hey, whydya start the party without us?" Kiera asked, and soon three snowmobiles were zipping around down the mountain, evading a maelstrom of enemy fire. Near the base the milita had been rallied when news of the Alphas presence on the planet had reached their ears. The three snowmobiles zipped behind their lines and the Alphas were met with a wall of weapons fire, and retreated.

"OHHH! LEAVIN SO SOON< AH WE?" Lynx taunted the Alphas as they retreated. "Yeah, they fohgot theah pink tutus to go to battle with!" Another man chimed in. "Aye, leave it to a bunch o sissies to fight like that!" yet another man added. Soon the air was full of taunts like "They needed special suits built so they could revel in the smell of theah own fahts!" and others like it. Jade looked at G and smiled; G smiled back, and they laughed. "Howdya like that for a rescue?" Kiera asked. "We were like BAM! And they were like 'Oh, please dont hurt us' and we were like nope gotta," she added. "We were swift and quick at the same time!" Marcus added. "You guys were great," Jade said. "I hope that guy who saved us up there is all right..." G said. "What guy?" Kiera asked. "Some soldier guy, came and saved us from a cold, painful death," G said. "He also gave up his snowmobile so we could escape," Jade added. "Something seemed kinda familiar about him, though..." she continued. "Well, dont you worry about that fella, well find him soonah oah latah," Lynx said. "Foah now, lets all go get us a drink and celebrate!" he added.

Back at the bar, Lynx asked Jade over to a small table. "Since Pants is gone, I figuah youd best get this to his family, wheahevah they may be," Lynx said, and handed her an mDisk. "What is it?" Jade asked. "Its a few last wohds to his family back home weah he is from," he replied. "Ill do my best," Jade said. "He left messages to everyone who evah had an affect on his life theah. It would mean alot to us if you could get it back to his folks, if theyah still alive," Lynx added. "I will do whatever it takes," Jade replied. "Thank ye, and good luck on youah adventuahs," Lynx added.

Jade inserted the mDisk with the map in it into Peyjs armputer, and the map pieced together where they needed to go next: The planet called Aridia, a desert planet. They loaded up into the beluga and headed off.

"Whoever that upstart soldier was, I want him! Dead or alive!" EVILPants said back on the mountain. "I am headed to Aridia to meet our friends there. If you do not find that soldier, it will be your heads!" He said to his subordinates, red, ultra evil eyes glowing, as he boarded his dropship. As his dropship rose up, it revealed the mystery soldier, who was standing right behind it. "Temper, temper! Maybe a soothing stomach lozenge, or maybe a relaxing trip to the spa would do him some good," the soldier said; he subsequently took out the two Alphas standing there and stole their dropship, and headed towards Aridia.

Oh noes!!!1 EVILPants is headed for the planet that Jade is heading for that the Mystery Soldier is heading for! I smell a thrilling confrontation!

All I can say is: Nice!!! It is becoming a bit more serious now, the story remains a good one.