When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know.

I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying 'Hello.' I politely said, 'This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?'

Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear 'Get the right f*** ing number!' and the phone was slammed down on me.

I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down Robyn's
correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.

After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled 'You're an ******* !' and hung up. I wrote his number down with the word '*******' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer.

Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, 'You're an ******* !' It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic ******* calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, 'Hi, this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?'

He yelled 'NO!' and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, 'That's because you're an *******!' and hung up.

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a ' For Sale' sign in his back window, so I wrote down his number.

A couple of days later, right after calling the first ******* (I had his number on speed dial), I thought that I'd better call the BMW *******, too.

I said, 'Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?'

He said, 'Yes, it is..' asked, 'Can you tell me where I can see it?'

He said, 'Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax . It's a yellow rambler, and the car's parked right out in front.'

I asked, 'What's your name?' He said, 'My name is Don Hansen.'

I asked, 'When's a good time to catch you, Don?'

He said, 'I'm home every evening after five.'

I said, 'Listen, Don, can I tell you something?'

He said, 'Yes?'

I said, 'Don, you're an ******* !'

Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too. Now, when I had a problem, I had two *******s to call.

Then I came up with an idea.

I called ******* #1.

He said, 'Hello.'

I said, 'You're an *******!' (But I didn't hang up.)

He asked, 'Are you still there?'

I said, 'Yeah.'

He screamed, 'Stop calling me!'

I said, 'Make me.'

He asked, 'Who are you?'

I said, 'My name is Don Hansen.'

He said, 'Yeah? Where do you live?'

I said, '*******, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax, a yellow rambler, I have a black Beamer parked in front.'

He said, 'I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers.'

I said, 'Yeah, like I'm really scared, *******,' and hung up.

Then I called ******* No. 2.

He said, 'Hello?'

I said, 'Hello, ******* .'

He yelled, 'If I ever find out who you are...'

I said, 'You'll what?'

He exclaimed, 'I'll kick your ass,'

I answered, 'Well, *******, here's your chance.

I'm coming over right now.'

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax , and that my gay lover was on his way over to kill me.

Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd. in Fairfax .

I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax I got there just in
time to watch two *******s beating the **** out of each other in front of
six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew.

NOW I feel much better.

Anger management works

LMFAO

Huggy87, That was YOU!!!!!!!

You Goddam sonofa*****. When I find you I'm gonna #%^*$(%(%$^*%^%%*$@##!*&&)

LMAO.

Huggy,
if that's a true story, it is the best anecdote I have seen in this forum. I truely enjoyed it.
Great job.
Perfect.
What an excellent and creative way to get some pay-back on some real ***holz.
However; if you made that story up, then you should be a sit-com writer.

quote:

Originally posted by M2morris:
Huggy,
if that's a true story, it is the best anecdote I have seen in this forum. I truely enjoyed it.
Great job.
Perfect.
What an excellent and creative way to get some pay-back on some real ***holz.
However; if you made that story up, then you should be a sit-com writer.

I've seen it before, more than once even.

Still funny though.

At first i thought it was real until...

"He yelled 'NO!' and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, 'That's because you're an *******!' and hung up."

Then I laughed out loud. Which i don`t do often.

That was hilarious.

I'd love to get back at the everyday *******s that make your life just a little bit more annoying.

I know it probably isn't, but I'm wishing it's true!

quote:

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic ******* calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, 'Hi, this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?'

He yelled 'NO!' and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, 'That's because you're an *******!' and hung up.

I've seen this before as well, but it's still very funny.

that is awesome. cant wait to try my own version of it..

...If only I could take credit for this one.

I have a very high temper threshhold, but the stealing your parking spot right in front of me is one that can blow it.

Haha...excellent. You really do have to have some kind of release valve although I'm not sure if this is the way to do it

quote:

Originally posted by huggy87:
...If only I could take credit for this one.

I have a very high temper threshhold, but the stealing your parking spot right in front of me is one that can blow it.

I had a guy try that on me once at a gas station. He cut right in front of me and tried to go to the pump I was waiting for. I got out of my truck and said:" Hey man, you know damned well I was sitting here waiting for that ****ing pump!" He said oops sorry and backed out. I was supprized.

quote:

Originally posted by M2morris:

quote:

Originally posted by huggy87:
...If only I could take credit for this one.

I have a very high temper threshhold, but the stealing your parking spot right in front of me is one that can blow it.

I had a guy try that on me once at a gas station. He cut right in front of me and tried to go to the pump I was waiting for. I got out of my truck and said:" Hey man, you know damned well I was sitting here waiting for that ****ing pump!" He said oops sorry and backed out. I was supprized.

Actually, i`ve seen something very similar with queues (yes, queues) in Britain. Sometimes, you`ll get the odd bolshy guy who will walk right in front of a queue. Most people are just too polite (and stunned) to do anything. But if you approach them, 9/10 they`ll back off.

Had it with 2 girls once, stepped right in front of me in a queue. I confronted them, and looking annoyed, they backed off.

Could be a foreign thing too. We get quite a few foreign people here nowadays (they don`t understand queues).